Up the Peng Ke!
Months ago, on a mission to simultaneously party with Zakhar, introduce Eric to something other than the mainstream, and cleanse Marta’s sweet soul of Celine Dion’s foul taint, I dragged my friends out in full metal regalia to a Beijing punk rock show. At least that’s what was on the flier. “Up the pung kuh suh!” it said. “Pogo Qi Lai!” (more…)
The Noodle Soup Stand
Posted from: Beijing
This Imperial Palace, said an internet guide to Chinese tourism, was built in 1772 during the heyday of the Qing Dynasty and destroyed by war disasters in the 19th century. Upon which grounds, Emmanuel Goldstein and I discovered on arrival, a commemorative landfill has been built in homage to kingdoms and conquerors past. (more…)
Life, The Universe, and Introspection
Posted in: Beijing, China
It turns out that it takes a sort of vigilance not to go dull with solitude. I’ve made the observation on several occasions that speech, wit and elocution – all the externals of human interaction – are like muscles. They go flaccid in disuse. I used to think it was romantic.
So it goes. (more…)
Haerbin: Second trip to the Ice Lantern Festival
Posted from Haerbin, Northern China
Twelve hours up on the train, and having an 18-hour non-express return trip to look forward to, Elena, Eric and I navigate through the city of Haerbin, China’s northeastern city of lights. I tried to explain the magnificence of my last trip on the way up, crushed between the top sleeper berth and the roof of the train, and in doing so may have hyped it up beyond salvation, but nevertheless… (more…)
University Ranked #1 in Food Safety
Posted from: Beijing, China
“B?” Diana said. “I dunno, you sure you wanna eat here?” We were standing outside of an Indian restaurant over on Fairfax Ave staring at the health department sanitary-rating sign in the window. “You wanna gag on a hair halfway through your curry?” (more…)
The Language Partner
I’m good at saying no. Some people have a really hard time with it. They don’t want to offend anyone, or they just find themselves complying before they really considered what ‘And just write your phone number in there at the bottom’ might mean. Not me, man. My No is many things. It can be soft and gentle like a Downey dryer sheet, it can be some dude with no muffler running the engine under your window at 3AM, it can be one tailored, professional sunnofabitch. (more…)
Run up to the Beijing Olympics
Posted from: Beijing
When I arrived in Beijing, there were two, and only two, topics on everyone’s tongue. First was the centenary of the late Deng Xiao Ping’s birth, and the second is the 2008 Olympics, scheduled to be held here. (more…)
Bicycle Derby
Posted from: Beijing, China
My goal for the day was not to die.
I didn’t wake up with extreme sports on the brain. When I yawned and stretched at the God-awful hour imposed by the time difference, my first thoughts were not on how effectively I could off myself before sundown. I did have a pile of stuff to do, though, and had to do them faster than my feet could carry me and slower than a cab driver’s slurred Chinese. You see where this is going. I rented a bike. (more…)
Back in the ‘Jing
Posted from: Beijing, China
China. I’m back.
And before you ask or hope I had a, it was a superb trip. Su-perb. Travel at its economy class best. I slept through 9 hours of the flight, sprawled across the [only] empty seat [on the plane] next to me. I watched other passengers tentatively poking their egg and radon omelets while I nipped at Hollywood food from my backpack buffet. I invoked the scathing laser-beam enthusiasm of not one stewardess smiling as though around a mouth full of live worms. I got the last room in the first hotel of my choice, a decent discount, and then held and understood an entire Chinese conversation about how to use the telephone. There’s toilet paper, hot water, and – keep your hats on – temperature control. (more…)
Chiang Mai to Bangkok: Flight of the Visaless Valkyrie
Posted from: Los Angeles
There’s a very good reason that I ended up back here in Los Angeles several months too early, and without so much as a by-your-leave. It was a peaceful Monday morning like any other. I had sweat out 50% of my body fluids in my sleep and mutant, tropical bugs were waiting in my bathroom to send me yelping and mincing out of the shower – revenge for swallowing their compatriots in the night. (more…)